What Is Cool, What Is Not Cool

Thu Jul 12, 2007 10:00 am

As the inaugural entry in the new/improved De Fakto Megazine, we have decided to holla at the cool things in life: the creme de la creme of hip, the reason for that swagger in your step, the epitome of status and celebrity. These are the things that are cool.

1. Crooked-ass shades
2. Crooked-ass teeth
3. Bums with altruistic-ass swagger
4. Under the table monies
5. Bomb-ass wedding receptions
6. Hitting the airport bar between flights for the altitude induced buzz
7. Big-ass hats
8. Big asses
9. Flossy-ass hood rats (when they're not prostitutes or trannies)
10. Ending adjectives with "ass"

A wise man once said, "sometimes the cure is worse than the disease." In this case, the medicine is a bitter pill to swallow and only serves to make those irritated, gangrenous sores worse. These, my friends, are things uncool.

1. Not being able to get Oh's at your local grocery
2. Live music purists
3. Vinyl purists
4. Annoying appendages (that weird ear flap and, in some cases, the clitoris)
5. Prince Paul's last album (best to keep it true, homey)
6. B-boy beefs (off the dancefloor)
7. 24-hour coverage of worthless people
8. Shorts instead of skirts; high-waisted instead of hip-huggers
9. Oppressive heat (unless it's on the dancefloor)
10. Ending any word in "izzle" unless you're Snoop or 'Hova.